RECORDS TUMBLE AS AGE PROVES NO BARRIER AT ANCIENT SEAT OF LEARNING.

A Kamikazee Weekenders batting performance was saved by a thundering Pytches ton. (See scoring chart below). A slow pitch caused numbers 2-11 in batting order to take aerial route but thanks to Pytches 116 ‘Enders posted gettable 193 all out.

Evelyn (travelling with PJ Harvey) showed polite interest in the progress of the innings from a chair on the boundary. Eight Weekenders helpfully surrounded her ready to answer any questions she might have.

Swift, Freeman, Read and Douglas shattered the slip cordon aggregate age record. A total of 229 years of experience hunkered down to sieze on Balliol batting errors. The paparazzi in the form of Evelyn captured the historic moment on Kodak Gold. The veterans were quickly into the thick of things as captain d’Inverno’s first over contained three off-side wides.

After pulling off a miraculous run out from a chase, turn, throw and direct hit that had no.3 batsman out by yards, the Skipper was borne shoulder-high by the delirious slip cordon who immediately regretted it.

Read landed superb catch at mid-off – then had to be restrained from covering it in breadcrumbs and marketing it on boundary.

A robust Emeriti response was halted by devastating spell of bowling by the Weekenders President Swift. Swifty’s thrifty three-for included the vital scalp of his son, the Emeriti skipper, Adam on 43. With two wickets in as many balls the President’s over-wily hat-trick delivery failed to turn the requisite seven feet and was retrieved by slip. Understandably, the bowler insisted on mid-on being moved to the long-on boundary. When the ball went to mid-on he exercised his Presidential right and shouted at the skipper ``Why on earth didn’t you give me a mid on?’’.

A record three generations of Swifts were on the park at the same time: Clive bowling, Adam batting and Danny patrolling the covers.

Hargroves was temporarily unable to chase ball owing to off-the-field preoccupations.

Emeriti shut up shop with seven down and 50 to get. Douglas and Freeman were unable to achieve breakthrough. The doughty eighth-wicket pair appeared over the moon in the pub afterwards. Uncomfirmed reports suggest they are still there; unmoved and unrepentant.

David Pytches’ magnificent 116 – how they came: